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May 26th, 2012

It Has Come To This, Dear Readers, Your Resident Diva-Worshipper Needs Help Attending Beyonce At Revel On Sunday Night

Bey

Long story short, it pains me how excited and anxious I am at the same time. This four-night run of Beyonce shows are sold out. And they’re also certain to be mind-blowingly awesome. Tickets were purchased months ago, but I was only able to purchase them with a FAT check on Wednesday thinking I’d find a companion at SOME point before Sunday. Wrong.

Obstacle #1: Everyone has Memorial Day weekend plans wayyyyy before the Wednesday before.

Obstacle #2: Originally, they were bought for $667 on StubHub. I wrote a check for $615. I’m hoping for $300 from a partner but at this point am feeling negotiable.

Obstacle #3: Getting back. There’s ample trains TO Atlantic City on Sunday evening. But the return trip is a frightening prospect. See, normally there’s a late-night NJ Transit train from Atlantic City to Philadelphia BUT NOT ON MONDAY, MAY 28th. So drivers would be saviors.

Obstacle #4: There is a veritable SEA of Beyonce ticket ads on Craigslist. Seriously. So that’s why I’m calling on you, friends.

See, I would’ve tried to attack Revel PR people with treasures and gifts to ply press access out of them, but they don’t give an F. They’ve got ballers with dollars falling out of their pockets happily paying full-price for tickets to this thing. But a freaked-out music writer is worried about this turning into a $600 self-date where I sleep on the beach until buses run in the morning on Monday.

Well, I turned to Craigslist last night with an ad that I didn’t even realize was suggestive of dateness. I’m not looking for that folks. Here’s the text of the ad with a photo of the tickets and I’ll ask that you respond through the ad, since I don’t have a non-personal email address to offer:

Tickets

This is really tough. I’m PUMPED about this show. But worried about this extra ticket that I have. I’m going to try to be delicate about this language because there’s loads of potential for weirdness here.

I’m not looking for a date here, but I’m looking for someone to help me afford this Beyonce experience. And, well, I’m gay.

So preferably a female or a gay man doesn’t have plans for Sunday night and has $300+ to spend on the Queen Bey. I’m a 29-year-old writer and waiter in Center City Philly, and in an ideal world, a Philadelphian would want to drive and I’d go halfs on gas.

Let’s go. Here’s a photo of dem tickets.”

HERE’S DAT URL: http://philadelphia.craigslist.org/tix/3038831587.html

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