Try to keep up: We’re one of the seven best beer cities in the country (whatever in God’s name that means), the fourth most romantic city and the second worst city in general for the half of the species that produces sperm. And we’re really ugly. [Esquire]

Philadelphia-based U.S. Attorney Laurie Magid should be “disciplined” for fundraisers held at her house for Former Senator Arlen Specter and Rep. Pat Meehan, according to the U.S. Office of Special Counsel. And by should be disciplined, they mean won’t be disciplined, probably. [Daily News]

Like all Republicans across the country who want to be known as “union busters” and “definitely not gay,” lots of PA state legislators are saying they agree with Wisconsin Mayor Scott Walker’s actions that’ve ignited protests across that state. Morning Call asks if a similar situation could happen here. [Morning Call]

Every time you hear about Philadelphia’s pension crisis being bad, realize you’ve got nothing to worry about because it turns out Pittsburgh, Scranton and others are “severely distressed,” too. And it usually feels better to fail when someone else fails with you, correct? At least we’ll all crash and burn together, before we have time to turn Philadelphia “green” with windmills, farms and trains, just like in the 1800s! [Pa Independent]

If hints are any indication, like ones dropped on Fox 29 yesterday, Tom Knox may run for mayor after all as part of Former Mayor Street’s Puppet Regime.  [Inky]