Mark McGwire to be new hitting coach for the Cardinals

No, really.

This is where I ought to make a few jokes about McGwire offering young prospects advice on the best way to cram themselves and a buddy into a bathroom stall with hypodermic needles … but feh. I think what this really proves — as if we didn’t already know it — is that baseball has never really considered itself to have a “steroids problem.” It’s had a public relations problem, which is different. If Major League Baseball really considered the use of steroids to undermine the integrity of the game (which it assures us it does!) then Mark McGwire and his unconvincing “I don’t want to talk about the past” act would face a lifetime of palling around with Pete Rose at independent league ballparks and autograph sessions at seedy casinos, instead of regaining employment at the sport’s highest levels.

Simple as that.