One of my myriad non-blogging jobs is (simplified explanation) messing with images in Photoshop so that they will print properly, and every time I have to tone a giant batch of awards-show red-carpet photos, it makes me more sympathetic to the outfits that show up under the next day’s “What were they thinking?” headline. Because I’m sitting there, and I’m Photoshopping an actress in a pretty, understated blue dress, Photoshopping a singer in a pretty, understated red dress, Photoshopping a celebrity in a pretty, understated black dress, Photoshopping… Lady Gaga wearing, like, a drag-queen Armani Sputnik or something and holding something that would not make it through airport security?
Who would get more male approval (well, also female approval, judging from all the WTF faces on women in the background of the above image)? Probably Taylor Swift. But who looks totally not boring? Lady Gaga.
In the same vein, Imogen Heap wore a dress that’s not particularly my cup of tea aesthetically, but is nevertheless pretty cool. There’s not a ton of pictures of it, because she won one of the boring awards they don’t show on TV, but the collar of her DIY dress has LED lights in it that scrolled messages tagged #twitdress from Twitter. The outfit also had a little purse-like box with what appears to be an iphone inside showing pictures that fans tagged #twitdress, as seen below:
Unfortunately, as with many things involving Twitter, most people seemed to miss the point of this a little, as there are a lot of “Cool dress!” and “I’m watching the Grammys!” and “Imogen Heap is awwwwesome congrats Immi!!!!” and links rather than, like, a well-timed “IMMA LET YOU LET YOU FINISH, BUT…”
But yes, give me Bai Ling and Kelis, give me Rihanna and Ciara, give me Kanye and Amber Rose, give me Bjork wearing a dead swan and MIA wearing a giant neon thing. Christ, at least they have some stones (figurative ones!) Because in the immortal words of Kanye West’s CAPS LOCK BLOG:
IT’S FUNNY TO ME WHEN FASHION BLOGGERS DOWN OUR OUFITS AND THEN SUPER JOCK OUTLANDISH shit ON THE RUNWAY BUT THEN THEY DRESS MAD PRUDE AND DON’T LIVE FASHION. WE LIVE IT MAN. FUCK THAT, WE LIVE IT!!! WE LIVE IT SO HARD PEOPLE LIVE THROUGH US! WE REPRESENT YOUR INNER SPIRIT!!
Well said, Kanye’s blog.