While I realize sports fans are a peculiar group of consumers—one willing to buy just about anything you put their favorite team’s logo on—I couldn’t believe how much ridiculous Phillies merch I came across this past week.
I mean, I’m willing to excuse some pretty eccentric gear in the sake of team spirit, but there’s a thin line between fun and flat-out stupid.
And these products crossed it…
Yep, nothing says ‘hardcore Phils fan’ like a fake tribal tattoo.
THE TREES ARE ALIVE! AHHH!!!
Half-man. Half-Dr. Seuss character. What a great game day look. Or you could just dye your actual hair red.
If an army of Phillies gnomes doesn’t keep people off your lawn, what will?
For the love of God, please don’t buy this shirt for your father.
Because on game day, name brand hand sanitizer just won’t do—it needs to have a Phillies sticker on it.
Funnier than the product itself is this photo…and the disclaimer: “Not for competitive use or reducing light glare.”
Unless you’re under 12 years of age, this is absolutely unacceptable.
Really, they couldn’t find a more appropriate place to put the hook?