Aw, one of our Philly blog buddies got featured in an Apartment Therapy house tour! Jealous! Lovely house, Elizabeth (of Peacock Feathers), but I swear to god if you’re the one who bought the big stuffed marlin/sailfish thing from AIDS Thrift about three years ago when I was 22, broke and waiting for my sad paycheck to clear so I could come back and buy it, I am going to march over to your “eclectic rowhouse” and I am going to scuff your fancy wallpaper.

The shop opens today at 12:30, so get thee to Passyunk Ave. to peep their extensive selection of locally produced treats.

The Erace boys have been leaking details about the shop’s products on Twitter—hummus from Zahav, barbecue sauce from Pub & Kitchen, Antoine Amrani chocolates and (our personal fave) popcorn from boardwalk icon Johnson’s—as well as linking some sweet shots of Green Aisle’s interior, which we took the liberty of borrowing to give all y’all a peek. (Thanks, Adam!)

Also: Swag alert! The first 50 customers who drop $20 at Green Aisle get these lovely, durable totes, which were designed by local (m)ad men (and women) at Red Tettemer.

Regular hours will be noon-8p.m. Monday through Friday, 11 a.m. to 8 p.m. on Saturday and noon to 5 p.m. on Sundays.

Design Sponge has a tour of Philadelphia Weekly contributor and calligrapher Mara Zepeda’s (dude, I remember fact-checking her stuff back in my PW intern days!) pretty Powelton Village house, proving that a freelance writer/artist and a grad student can totally put together a really beautiful home despite having the budget of a freelance writer/artist and a grad student. Lady’s got a lot of art I would like to get my hands on, that is for sure.

OK, you are no longer living in a dorm. You do not lead a completely joyless life. Nor do you live most fully when playing World of Warcraft. Failing to put anything on bare, white walls, like in the picture above, sends a signal to potential sex partners that you may be at least one of the above. So what to do with bare white walls to make a good impression?

PAINT:

Obviously, painting is a good option if you’re allowed; a hardware-store gallon of paint is only about $20, painting most rooms only takes a few hours and not having your wall be dorm-room white does wonders for your quality of life. But use really bright colors sparingly; they look pretty on the paint chip but are way darker than you’d expect when covering an entire room.

ART:

Hanging art is another option. However, keep in mind that if you’ve seen a piece of art in the apartments of more than a couple people, you should maybe keep looking for something more interesting. For example:

None of the above posters should be found in an adult home. The message you want to send is “I am interesting and have my post-collegiate shit together, potential sex partner” not, “Dude, I just discovered this SWEET underground artist called Dali, oh no WAY you’ve heard of him too? BTW, don’t you totally love beer/college/some movie/faux-arty lesbians? Because I totally love beer/college/some movie/faux-arty lesbians.”

But Emily G! you say, How can I afford to put stuff on my walls when I have zero dollars?

Well, there are various events around town, such as the Punk Rock Flea Market and Art for the Cash Poor, at which you can get neat prints for not that much, but when neither of those are happening, here’s a few ideas for making your own cheap art:

WALL OF FAMILY:

Get hold of a bunch of old family photos, preferably unposed and of only one or two people. Scan, print, blow up, whatev. Black and whites can be printed big on regular paper rather than photo paper without too noticeable a difference except in price, as color photo 8×10s can get very expensive. Frame 4×6s with IKEA clip frames, which are about a quarter apiece, and there’s an 8.5×11 document frame at Dick Blick (at 13th and Chestnut) for like $3. Arrange in a big, parallel-ish blob as far away from the bed as possible. On a similar note:

YOUR OWN PICTURES REALLY BIG:

If you take hi-res pictures and know someone who’s willing to lend you their Sam’s Club number, they do photo enlargements for ridiculously cheap: the largest size is a 20″ x 30″ poster print shipped to your house for under $12. The quality apparently isn’t bad, either. But don’t try to print pictures that were obviously not taken by you, they’re big on copyright.

MIRRORS:

But not this mirror:

FRAME SOME WRAPPING PAPER:

Another option: in addition to cheap frames, Dick Blick has a wall of wrapping paper sheets that actually make pretty decent art. They fit in standard poster frames, and they’re $3.

OK, some of the postcard-y ones on the right are a little cheezy, but maps? Vintage desserts? Phrenology charts? Anatomical illustrations? Definitely! I’ve got a skeletal system one framed in my room:

There’s also a whole bunch of really nice patterns that would look good framed (maybe more so if you’re a lady than a guy):

I also used one of these patterns to make my ugly bathroom slightly less ugly by spray-adhering a piece to the back of my broken bathroom cabinet:

THRIFT STORE ART:

This is always hit or miss, but I’ve found some pretty awesome art at thrift stores that I can be sure nobody else is going to have on their wall, such as this tiny-headed cat:

You can also buy crappy art with hopes of modifying it into not-crappy art; painting new things into landscapes, for example.

If the art is irredeemably crappy (motivational posters?) but in a nice frame and cheap, take it home, throw out the motivational poster, then stick the frame in the closet until you find something you like that fits in the space. You’ll have saved, like, $15 at least.

That’s all I got for now. Anyone else have any tips on covering wall space for cheap?

There are some craft projects that make me go “Whoa!” and some craft projects that make me go “Nice!” But there are very few craft projects that make me go “YEAAAAH!” This is one of that last kind.

I’m not usually so much a coaster girl (I’m more of a ‘all horizontal surfaces of my furniture have at least one light circle’ girl), but this project, done by Jeanne Lombardo over at the Philly Makes blog, is utterly Boss.

Having coasters that feature young Bruce Springsteen’s ass would probably increase party coaster usage at least 300%, and just think what a delight it would be to put the set back together at the end of the night.

Some other albums I thought might work well as jigsaw-type coasters:

My personal preference would be one in which each individual square had a lot of teeny details that a coaster holder may not have noticed when observing the cover as a whole. The Rolling Stones’ “Some Girls” is a good one for that, as are Michael Jackson’s “Dangerous” and Architecture in Helsinki’s “Places Like This.” I mean, good god, just look how awesome every single individual square of “Dangerous” is on its own!

Or something super EPIC in that fantasy/metal way:

Or you could go for one like Lemon Jelly’s Lost Horizons (which has helped me get innumerable papers done over the years, thanks, Lemon Jelly!) in which each square could be its own little painting, although your chances of coming across this in the vinyl section of a thrift store are low:

And finally, Roxy Music’s “Country Life,” because who doesn’t like boobs?

tons of Taxidermy Vintage – $1 (Pipersville, Bucks county)

Reply to: sale-ahnuu-1228656089@craigslist.org ^{[Errors when replying to ads?]}

Date: 2009-06-18, 8:53PM EDT

I am cleaning out my man cave. Lots of assorted skulls, horns, skins, some mounts. 40 years of collecting

from around the world……..rare and unusual…………very reasonable.

call me Louie 267 261 4715

• Location: Pipersville, Bucks county
• it’s NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests

Side note: I quit smoking yesterday. If anyone has any info on where one might procure a fake cigarette, not one of those fancy electronic vaporizer ones, just a reasonable facsimile of a cigarette I can put in my mouth and pretend to smoke, for the love of god tell me where I can buy one. Any other smoking-quitting advice would also be appreciated.

I may also be posting more frequently about things that I hate, such as the term “man cave,” for the next few months. Bear with me!

A few things that led up to the Bowie bust:

1. I cannot not buy crappy busts in thrift stores if they are under $5. I love them.

2. Since I continue to buy them, the whole “spraypaint it a bright color!” thing is getting a little overdone in my apartment.

3. When I moved into my apartment, I turned a large portion of one of the living room walls into a giant chalkboard for calendar/grocery list purposes. Every time I have a party, the chalkboard tends to get covered in crudely drawn penises. Like so:

4. To see if we could avoid the wall o’ dicks at the party we had a couple of weeks ago, my boyfriend came up with this idea, which is harder than you’d think:

5. The crappily drawn (I can say it, I drew it) cover of Aladdin Sane (far left, middle row) has therefore been staring at me for about two weeks now (I’ve found myself humming Ziggy Stardust while making dinner for no reason several times), so the obvious thing to do was glam old Napoleon up.

Materials:

1 crappy thrift-store bust

White spraypaint

Pink/lavender, red, blue and black paint (nail polish would probably work, too)

1 picture of Aladdin Sane (here, I’ll just give you one)

So if you did Warhammer as a kid… this would be the time to pull out the old teensy paintbrush. I do not have one; in fact, I have never even heard of Warhammer. I ended up using my smallest paintbrush and a needle for the detail work.

First you take that sucker and spraypaint it white. Be patient and use two or three thin coats, giving them time to dry in between, otherwise it’ll get goopy and drippy. Then get out whatever you’re using as paints:

First, give the whole face a light-pink/lavender coat, then shade in the cheekbones and eyes etc. with a darker pink. THEN comes the big lightning bolt, and save the black for last.

At first I was going to leave his eyes open, but it was too creepy and I just painted eyelids over them.

I was fortunate enough to have won a set of iridescent paints at Art for the Cash Poor last weekend, and they were perfect as a top coat. I’m sure glitter nail polish would work, too.

And now Napoleon Stardust may take his place amongst the other tchotchkes on the Anal-Retentive Bookshelf of Happiness!

P.S. Extra special bonus points if you can identify all the albums:

"the global warming rug"

"das rug"-- hey, it's honest!

"the felted river stone rug"

"grand, grand splash rug"

…annnd my personal favorite I’ve decided that I cannot live without:

"over easy egg rug"

ceramic italian tiles (essington)

Reply to:sale-qqkdc-1201051354@craigslist.org

Date: 2009-06-02, 4:13AM EDT

probaly about 100 more or less tiles measure about 8×8inches ,4 of them make a pattern , they were pulled up off a floor about 20 years ago,they were an expensive tile at the time and my father saved them,there is some grout on the backs but not much pretty clean , would serve good for a small project or out doors type deal ,its a good deal , FREE . id hate to throw them out after all that time being stored . lol . thanks , just email me for address to pick up , i can leave them outside for you . 19029 essington, near philly air port

 

 

• Location: essington

 

• it’s NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests

 

PostingID: 1201051354