Lady Gaga’s Bad Romance

Upon first glance: Is that thing from a Dali landscape, Star Wars, Hell or a disco ball? 

I can’t wrap my brain around those shoes and everything around them. What am I talking about? Um, well, aside from presumably millions of dollars of borrowed couture, I’m talking about a music video that is impossible to watch only one time. Lady Gaga (and the Haus of Gaga) have really outdone themselves this time with Bad Romance… and I love it. 

In fact, the outfits attached to those shoes are compelling me to make-up words. Really– you take one good look at the McQueen shoes in front of you and tell me you don’t get all Anthony Burgess on me. I dare you.
 

This video has all the standards from our favorite Fame Monster: lingerie, hairless pets, Bladerunner Replicants, synthesizers, spirit fingers, a foreign syndicate, twitching, latex … and I’m pretty sure she’s single-handedly raised Ferragamo from the dead. Jesus.

Here are some stills from the Bad Romance video… She must wear 10 separate intricate outfits/ dresses/ works, including one by Alexander McQueen that leaves her looking like a creepy, bolted, gold-studded cupcake/geisha/ant with 10-inch heeled stiletto hooves.

“The singer-songwriter-pianist-provocateur seems to be one of the few pop stars these days who really understands spectacle, fashion, shock, choreography all the things Madonna and Michael Jackson were masters of in the 1980s.” (Speakeasy)

Closing thoughts? Lady Gaga and Alexander McQueen need to go pro-create and begin breeding their own little army of slicked back, shiny, matching offspring. Have you seen his Spring/Summer 2010 line that debuted to her soundtrack, with her custom dress from the video as the last outfit in the runway show? Music met couture and fell in love. In fact, they’re paired off  and make more sense than coupling milk and goddamn cookies.

We know we can take you seriously when you said pop music will never be lowbrow. Bravo, Gaga.

Live and Let Tie

Well now. I’d like the boys of Tie or Die: Who Wore It Best? to take a bow: for those of us watching, they were two very dapper gents all October long. Jon and Ryan have helped me set my wardrobe expectations a little higher for young dudes in the work place.

You hear that, boys born after 1980? It is no longer enough to merely wash your work clothes– from now on, you’re going to have to match.

These lads were hardly at a loss for votes; the verdict came in at Jon: 2795 total votes and Ryan with 3532 total votes. Despite some nail-biter weeks, the verdict is out: Ryan won.

Congrats! And for the record, Ryan: I think you look damn fine in a vest. We’ll be awaiting Jon’s …aftermath.. in photos. High fives!

Selk’bag

As a longtime freelancer,  my prayers has been answered by this crazy outfit-bed… thing: The Selk’Bag.

The Selk’Bag is a “sleep and wear” system (–and all this time I thought that term was specific to my undergrad). Let’s take a little walk through what their website has to say about the product.  Just when I thought a dude who looks like the baby of the Stay Puft man and a convict jumpsuit was the most amusing thing on the page, the copy had to go and completely boggle my brain.

Considering that almost a 30% of our time is occupied sleeping,… greater fatigue and less hours of light  (winter), a good sleep is the key factor to recover consumed energy. A comfortable position, a suitable temperature and less restricted mobility are fundamental for a good rest.

(Duh.)

Nowadays, the maximum comfort level a sleeping bag offers, has a “material” relation: its filling and the space and air to warm up by our body (less space, better, due to a smaller cost of caloric energy)… high mountain trekkers, have special gear designed for extreme low temperatures: all the body parts together to transmit heat in a adjusted amount of space, spending the less amount of caloric energy as possible.

(WHAT? I think this was a fancy way of saying wearing warm clothes makes us not cold. Novel concept. Bill Nye is rolling his eyes.)

Movement is the greatest obstacle which we, the majority of sleeping bag users, face.

(WE?! I was not aware of the upwardly-mobile demographic of sleeping bag users, but I must have been mistaken.)

Therefore, we believe that, to be able to rest in spaces that are not high mountains, snow or cold places, a sleeping bag must be as nice and friendly as a bed is, and should give us the correct protection level towards coldness thanks to its materials, filling and the possibility to spread our heat through our body thanks to a good level of blood circulation.

(It’s okay, Selk’Bag copywriter. We like warm clothes and we’re not on a mountain, either.)

It’s interesting to observe what most of camping, cabin, beaches, woods, mountain, desert, lakes, etc. users are shouting for, mouth to mouth through a sorrowed hope:  MOVEMENT.

(Can I get an Amen?!)

Selk’Bag® is a sleeping system which allows to dress with your sleeping bag, giving a maximum mobility and comfort in periods of rest in a tent or outside it:

- Separate, move and join arms and legs
- Roll with your Selk’Bag®, not in it
- Stand without any trouble, walk, cross your legs and even grab certain elements with your hands thanks to its reversible zippers.

Mobility, maximum comfort for a perfect rest is Selk’Bag®’s fundamental idea, and each part of it is designed for that purpose. Enjoy your excursion with a 100% comfortable rest, just as you do in your bed.

(That’s all we needed to know, man.)

This could be a crime scene. Or your bedroom floor.

As awesome as this wearable sleeping bag is, I will always want one for the wrong reasons. Why? I think it looks like a Rebel jumpsuit… and really– what helps you sleep better at night than knowing you’re fighting the Empire?

I’m just sayin’.

Tie or Die: Who Wore It Best?

Ladies and gentlemen: I’ve found a website that will change your lives. Or  your opinion on the term “business casual.” PWstyle has a serious blog crush, and it’s on the boys of Tie or Die: Who Wore It Best? Two local Mad Men, Jon Fruman and Ryan Brown of 160over90,  have half-windsor‘d their way into our hearts by way of a friendly office competition.

So, how did it all start? The boys told me “the contest itself was sparked by some facebook boasting about having enough ties to wear a different one every day for a month” and developed from there. With that, we were impressed—considering most young professional men barely have enough boxers to get through a week, let alone enough formal accessories to last a month.

The rules clearly state that a different tie must be worn each day for the month of October. When asked if some competitive shopping was sparred, I was pleasantly surprised that the duo already owned most of their neckwear! It turns out that they both previously worked for banks and, as a result, had sharp business casual wardrobes and already knew how to dress like classy you-know-what’ers.

PWstyle: Ryan, we are north of the Mason-Dixon line and easily an hour south-east of the only place in this state that would allow regular equestrian travel. Where the hell did you find a bolo-tie?! Can we have it?

Ryan: I inherited three bolo ties from my grandfather a few years back. Apparently, when you’re in your 80’s, it doesn’t matter if you were raised in Philadelphia – you can still get away with a bolo tie. (And he said we could have one.)

PWstyle: Are you both aware that many celebrities and politicians have tie lines– seriously!– including Rush Limbaugh? Would you wear any or do you think they are all totally lame?
Jon: Rush Limbaugh? No. Sean John? Maybe. R-Kelly? Absolutely.

PWstyle: If your favorite tie was a band, who would it be, and why?
Ryan: My favorite is a plaid fabric tie—pretty rockin’. Kind of reminds me of Daryl Hall.
Jon: My favorite is slick and dark; it’s got some soul. Very “John Oates,” if you ask me.

They seem very Wayne and Garth in their e-demeanor. A few weeks back the boys wore their Phillies garb and when asked about potential World Series ties, I was given a cryptic answer and an invite to join one of them at game four. They also both insist they pick their duds out solo for the competition (with no help from a girlfriend or mom).

“The Winner will be able to choose a full outfit of attire to be worn by The Loser on the day of The Winner’s choosing. And the Loser has to go tanning wearing only a tie and undies – so that every time he looks at himself naked in the mirror he may be reminded that he should have tried just a little bit harder.”

The last day to vote is this Friday!

Be sure to go to Tie or Die and let these kids know who wore it best.

girl.bike.dog.

I was wandering around the weird triangle area around Grace Tavern this weekend, trying to recall where the hell I had parked my car the night the Phillies beat the Dodgers, when I wandered into the storefront of girl. bike. dog., at 23rd and Bainbridge.

The titular dog. His name is Vince.

The store sells a mix of store-made bike stuff and dog stuff, and, looking at the website, offers dog-walking services, which I didn’t notice when I was there. It opened the storefront this June.

The beer cozies, which come in standard and 40 sizes, can strap onto your bag or your bike so’s you don’t have to ditch your drink just because you’re ditching a party.

I asked whether the lack of traditional foot traffic at 23rd and Bainbridge was a problem (because seriously, the streets can get a little deserted down there during the day). The answer was that the foot traffic wasn’t as thick as on Walnut, but that the people who DID walk by tended to be on their way to the dog park at 25th and Spruce, and thus more likely to be interested in some of the dog accessories like the collars above.

They have a selection of messenger bags in the store (the one on the above left was made of a fallen billboard), and they also do custom stuff (below).

Top tube protectors:

They’ve got a blog, too, and when I looked it up, I was somewhat startled to find several pictures of my little sister’s boyfriend at the Wild Wild West race, 2008, and shooting a rifle in the woods with the store’s owner? Hee hee. Hi, Eric, you just turn up everywhere I look!

Postcards from L.A.

I’m back! While I was in California, I just happened to wander by the storefront of one of the Philly Fashion Week participants. They were closed, although I’m unsure if that is because they were in Philly at the time.

Don't leave your house without showing some pubes

Another notable thing in L.A. I thought I’d mention:

I found another plush giant squid! WTF! Of all the gin joints in all the towns in all the world, I walk into one with a plush giant squid. That’s not my pattern, though.

This was at this kind of silly cosplay-themed cafe/art gallery by the name of Royal T, which had for sale those very Murakami-Vuitton prints that created all the controversy a while back. I highly recommend visiting if you’re in the area. In the gallery part I found my new favorite interactive art installation, the Porta-Party:

You go in and close the door, and there’s an ipod duct taped to the wall playing dance music and a tiny disco ball hanging from the ceiling.

The creator, Nick Rodrigues, lists this as part of his human interaction series, saying:

If you walk around with a party going on inside your head and your just too shy to bust a move in public. Or if you like partying but hate people. Your prayers have been answered.
The “porta-party” is the place you can relieve your need to party it up. Just go inside and plug in.
Is this a statement about isolation or just a fun place to make out and do other scandalous activities?
Who knows, what I do know is it’s available for rent at your next party.

Silverlake’s KICKS. God, there were some excellent shoes.

And some lovely mid-century dresses at LACMA. Although, honestly, L.A. had vintage like I’ve never seen. I leafed through a ton of ’50s dresses in vintage stores that could have been in this tableau, no problem.

Anyway, I’m back! I missed you! Philadelphia

Slightly related: L.A. was nice and all but the Phillies will crush the Dodgers, see them driven before them and hear the lamentation of their women.

Teddy Scares

FACT: I want to wear this thing and unsuspectingly roll into a day care’s nap time and see what happens. Would the kids love me or fear me?!

The Teddy Jacket was designed by Sebastian Errazuriz. After looking at this…  mound of cuteness again (on around Errazuriz’s website) I realized that this isn’t his first readymade fashion piece. He also has a crazy zipper dress (that was floating around the internet earlier this summer) and a sweet dress and purse set made entirely of white gloves.

Each of his fashion pieces has an interesting idea behind it and a blunt, usually funny, commentary. I like it because there is a distinct theme yet he doesn’t seem to take himself too seriously. He’s so quirky! I think The Teddy Jacket is a tongue-in-cheek commentary about wearing fur, but comes off as more humorous than anything. Perhaps that’s the point?

But… this jacket. What can I say? Take a moment and really look at it. Theme aside, is this not the most hilarious/ awesome/ absurd piece of actual outdoor couture you’ve ever seen? As wacky as it is, it’s not nearly as trippy as Lady Gaga’s Kermit the Frog dress– but it is equally as silly. In my mind, I imagine Sebastian to be a Harry Potter look-a-like getting a cauldron and carefully placing children’s toys, a sewing kit, Teddy Grahams and a bomber jacket inside.. and poof!: something awesome. Go Sebastian!

Fried quail, naked bikers

This Labor Day weekend, I went to the two most over-hyped things in the city of Philadelphia: the Naked Bike and Village Whiskey.

Over-hyped doesn’t at all mean “bad,” though. Firstly, 80% of my reason for going to Village Whiskey was to see what a Kentucky Fried Quail looked/tasted like, and it was incredibly good:

NOTE: They don’t plate this in the ugliest way possible; VW seemed to be having some service problems Saturday night and our appetizer, dinner and second drink orders got lost in some black hole, so when the food finally arrived we started devouring it like wild beasts before I thought to take a picture. We did get free deviled eggs out of the mixups, though, so whatev. It was everything I had hoped a Kentucky Fried Quail would be.

The naked bike ride seemed to have every photo editor at every media outlet in town rubbing his/her hands together and cackling, because… naked people in body paint. The Daily Pennsylvanian in particular seemed to have sent 95% of its rookie photographers and reporters to the Schuylkill. It was a little ridiculous.

But because nobody can ever get enough pictures of naked people, here’s some more that I took yesterday (after the jump, because some people got very naked indeed) and check out the gallery from PW’s Jeff Fusco, who takes much better pictures than I do:

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An Ode to Ikea.

All of this can be summed up in a single sentence I shouted to my room-mate, “This is like some effed up game where you climb through wood and screws on your hands and knees… and if you don’t hurt yourself, you get a shelf.”

 

Bianca loses her mind: Philadelphia Half-Marathon Edition

I’m claiming a moment of temporary insanity: I’m signing up for the Philadelphia Half-Marathon in November. As an asthmatic that took up running the year after college, I’ve never attempted to run more than 5 miles in a row in my life …and I’m not sure what makes me think this a good idea (aside from the challenge), but …I’m goin’ for it!

I bought a new pair of running shoes in March before a 5k, and I was running an average of 20 miles a week back then for a few months… so I’m due for a new pair.

To ease my nerves on this ridiculous feat, here are photos of new running shoes I want/need. That is all.