Whitney Houston wants to dance with somebody.
Someone smack me: after 48 straight hours of humming this 80’s gem, I need some help. So what if I was three when this song was on the radio? I heard it on Saturday, and (–no thanks to my boyfriend!) it’s been lodged in my little brain like something cute and furry, hibernating, ever since.
After attempting to sing this in the shower, I realized that… I, um, don’t know all the lyrics. So, like any tune-savvy girl scout, I found the video on youtube (because, sadly, I don’t own this musical masterpiece…) and then watched the video 5 times straight.
Watching this again and again has NOTHING to with memorizing lyrics at this point; it has EVERYTHING to do with being hypnotized by her totally insane hair and makeup in the video. I think I’m high from the waves of Aqua Net wofting around her crown of wavy polymer hairpieces as she’s shakin’ it in her shoulder pads. Have I mentioned I think her eyeshadow resembles every nerf gun and pool toy I owned in elementary school? Jesus, I need some sunglasses: this woman is entirely out of control in her rainbowbrite get-up and it’s not pretty.
Good lord, Whitney– I don’t care about the coke: it’s this that makes me want to shake you… and then hug you… because you totally rule.
Uploaded by whitney08. – Family events, birthdays and parenting videos.
Yeah, I’d dance with you.
In Case You’ve Ever Wondered, “Hey, Where’s the Real Housewives of Philadelphia?!”
NOW CASTING
”THE WOMEN OF RITTENHOUSE SQUARE”
(Philadelphia, PA) July 31, 2009 — Beverly Hill’s has Rodeo Drive, New York has Fifth Avenue, and Philadelphia has Walnut Street. Forget everything you know about Philadelphia and immerse in a fantastic wonderland of opulence. We are going to change the way Philadelphia is perceived. Oceanfront Media Productions will give audiences an inside view of the lives of Philadelphia’s most fabulous women.
We are looking for real women, living dynamic lives, and speaking honestly about their thoughts and opinions. The women must be fun, outgoing, and active in Center City, Philadelphia.
We are looking for modern day women who have years of life experience. The future starlets should be fashionable and self-confident. The women, their significant others and families must be willing to share their lives with the television audience.
We are searching for a group of 4 to 7 women who are friends, relatives, neighbors, or have a bond together. The majority of the women must live in Center City. We are open to all ages but must be over 18 to apply.
Please send us your name, age, address, contact number, and the names of those who will be part of your group. Write a few words about yourself and your friends. Detail fun events or activities you have recently enjoyed. Please attach a recent photo. The email deadline is Friday, August, 28, 2009.
Check us out at oceanfrontmediaproductions@blogspot.com
The email address to apply or ask questions is realityshowsubmission@gmail.com.
Contact:
Stacy Catrell, Director of Public Relations
Oceanfront Media Productions
619-302-4830
stacycatrell@gmail.com
++++
We’re rolling our eyes and giggling at this already. We’ll totally watch but come on, guys. Have you been to Walnut Street lately? Unless you define “a fantastic wonderland of opulence” as a place that has both a McDonald’s and a Walgreen’s, we’re gonna wager it’s not quite the same as Rodeo Drive.
And as for changing the way Philadelphia is perceived, we’re going to point you toward this article that asserts that Parking Wars is the reason people hate our city.
Are Bikinis Too Revealing?
First, a quick look at the weekend weather forecast for Ocean City, NJ.
So maybe you won’t be tanning and playing beach volleyball this weekend. But that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t prepare for the summer by purchasing a flattering swimsuit.
A few weeks ago Emily G asserted that most women under the age of 35 look better naked than clothed and suggested some two-piece bathing suits. But perhaps you don’t agree. Perhaps you’ve always thought that modern swimsuits are just a little too revealing. A self-effacing gal like you certainly doesn’t want a bikini or even a skirted one-piece. Fear not, Modest Mary. We’ve found the perfect swimsuits for you, too!
To quote their website (emphasis mine),”WholesomeWear is a modest line of clothing for ‘wherever.’ Our WaterWear is the first to be introduced because the need for modesty in swimwear is greatest and the supply is almost non-existent. Swimwear that ‘highlights the face rather than the body‘ includes an undergarment with bright colors at the neck and shoulders to draw the eyes to the face.”
Here’s an example of their Extended Slimming Swimwear, which, as you can see below, covers both your elbows and your knees for ultimate coverage. This fine piece of presumably Amish craftsmanship will run you almost a hundred bucks, but that is a small price to pay for modesty.
KATIE HOLMES
I noticed this post by the delightful Zoe Strauss, who just had her big I-95 photography show last weekend, and got instant deja vu. She put up this picture:
I subscribe to a few Philly-related flickr streams, mostly to give myself a little visual break when digging through the vast mound of digital stuff excreted into my google reader by Philadelphians every day. I had a hunch I had seen KATIE HOLMES pop up at least once before there, and indeed:
Katie Holmes Sucks Under I-95, by Vincent J. Brown
And another (but without the appended ‘SUX’)!
KATIE HOLMES at Grey's Ferry and Annin, taken by serlingrod
They look like they’re the same handwriting, especially in the K and the M… who in god’s name would choose KATIE HOLMES as their tag?
Anybody seen any other examples of KATIE HOLMES around town?
WTF is this amazing sparkly thing at Uhuru?
I love Uhuru, the used-furniture store at 12th and Spruce, and thought I’d put it out there as a public service for anyone looking for cheap furniture but unwilling to venture outside to browse that they have a blog, which they update pretty frequently with new stuff that is donated.
Although I’ve done quite a bit of browsing at Uhuru during my time in Philly, and while I’ve seen a lot of neat chairs and couches and tables, I don’t think I’ve ever seen anything like this completely insane sparkly thing, which they appear to have just gotten in. Here is Uhuru’s description:
This etegiere is super awesome.
The prisms are great and the detail is super funky.
This thing is definitely older.
There is a matching hanging lamp with electrical already supplied.
Seriously, you will be the only person you know that has this.
Call for price of etegiere and lamp.
Oh, price on request, eh? And they are correct: I have never met anyone who owns this particular piece of furniture. The closest thing I can find on M-W is
Main Entry: éta·gère
a piece of furniture consisting of a set of open shelves for displaying small objects and sometimes having an enclosed cabinet as a base.
It also comes with some sort of chandelier lamp, which must attach somewhere above where the picture ends. I kind of want to wander over there today and figure out how this thing fits together before someone with a taste for the sparkles gets it.
Kitchy and Fantastic Etegiere and Hanging Lamp @ Uhuru blog
A Letter to Lady Gaga
Dear Lady Gaga,
We get it. You’ve got the best gams in show business. (Way better than that poser Xtina.) Do you think maybe you could put on some pants now? Please.
Love,
Erica
NYT Breaks News: Barack Obama Doesn’t Always Wear Suits
This passage from the New York Times is presented without comment.
APART from the trip to Washington to visit his new home, President-elect Barack Obama has been looking pretty casual of late. Instead of the familiar dark suits and solid dress shirts, he has variously worn a baseball cap with a North Face warm-up jacket, jeans and white sneakers, and a black windbreaker that some observers assumed was leather but, more likely, was nothing fancier than cotton.
Several things happened when Mr. Obama surrendered, if briefly, the formality of his suit. You realized what a celebrity he is. After all, we know celebrities not so much by what they wear on the red carpet as by what they wear at the airport or to run an errand: a baseball cap and some version of a track suit.
The only thing missing from photos of Mr. Obama entering his SUV is a Starbucks in hand.
Project Runway Episodes 11 and 12: And So It Goes…
A thousand apologies for the lack of Runway recaps last week. I was on holiday in Portland and was too busy throwing back microbrews to remember the time difference. Whoopsie. Thank god for reruns and fellow Runway fans.
WXPN doesn’t know what day it is
What in the sam hell?
First Jonatha Brooke and now THIS. DAMN this fucked me up this week. No wonder I’m past deadline on my next article. Not to mention payday.