Schizoaffective Disorder Made Them Do It: Arrest Me and Wrongfully Prosecute Me

Woman’s Beach jail lawsuit moves to federal court

liz | 4:37 PM | Uncategorized

New cartoon debuts on the WB

County labelled ‘kiddie coke capital’

liz | 11:31 AM | Uncategorized

Recovery Lesson, No. 1: I love meetings

I was in meetings all morning, so I’m late posting. The whole idea that someone would actually want me in a long meeting, well, it’s something I couldn’t have imagined when I was really ill. For that reason, I actually like meetings. They make me feel like I’m part of the normal world. I can complain with everyone else afterward, “Wow, that was long. Whew! I thought it’d never end!” But secretly, I love it. Every meeting feels like an accomplishment.

liz | 2:59 PM | Uncategorized

A harsh public response to a police killing

Vandals in Amsterdam attacked a police station to protest the police killing of a man with mental illness. But unlike some other cases in the U.S., in which people with mental illnesses are killed prematurely by police who are ill-trained for the interaction, in this case the homicide sounds, at the very least, understandable from the police officer’s point of view.

Bilal B. appeared at a police station, jumped over a desk, and immediately began stabbing the on-duty female police officer. She ran away, and Bilal chased after her, stabbing her in the back. A male officer came over to try to help, and Bilal attacked him as well; he is still in the hospital. The female officer turned around and shot Bilal. He later died of his injuries.

From that rendering of events, which I cobbled together from several news reports, I can’t really blame the female police officer for firing that shot. You can imagine the chaos and fear. But not everyone feels the way I do. Bilal’s parents, in turn, blame the psych clinic that released Bilal before he was competent.

Police station attacked after shooting

liz | 5:02 PM | Uncategorized

This headline is so thorough, I have nothing else to say

New Data Suggests Doctors Might Not Be Considering Depression Symptoms That Are Important to Patients, Such as Pain and Anxiety

liz | 1:50 PM | Uncategorized

TTWS does not endorse or condone the blah blah blah blah etc. etc. etc.

I just got this email from Will Hall, of the Icarus Project. Sounds intriguing:

*Harm Reduction Guide To Coming Off Psychiatric Drugs*

This 40-page guide gathers the best information we’ve come across and the most valuable lessons we’ve learned about reducing and coming off psychiatric medication. Includes information on mood stabilizers, anti-psychotics, anti-depressants, anti-anxiety drugs, risks, benefits, wellness tools, withdrawal, support for people staying on their
medications, a detailed Resource section, and much more.

The guide was written by Freedom Center co-founder and Icarus Project staff Will Hall, with a 14-member health professional Advisory Board comprised of medical doctors, nurses, psychologists and acupuncturists
providing research guidance. More than 20 other collaborators from the survivor movement were involved in developing and editing. The guide has photographs and art throughout, and a beautiful original cover painting
by Ashley McNamara.

Based in “harm reduction” philosophy, the guide emphasizes personal choice and weighing risks and benefits for each individual. It offers non-judgmental support to people continuing to take medication or lowering their dosage, as well as people exploring coming off. The risks associated with psychiatric medication are discussed along with risks of emotional distress and mental health crisis. Years of advocacy at the Freedom Center and Icarus Project have proven the effectiveness of this approach, which is neither pro-medication nor anti-medication, but
instead provides accurate information and offers choices and alternatives.

TO READ THE GUIDE AND / OR DOWNLOAD AND PRINT A COPY
You can read a .pdf copy of the guide online, download and share the pdf file, link to it from your site, and print it out here:

http://theicarusproject.net/HarmReductionGuideComingOffPsychDrugs

GO AHEAD AND SHARE THE GUIDE FREELY!
Please note that the guide is copyright Creative Commons, and you are *free to copy and distribute it* without alteration, for non-commercial purposes, and with credit to the source.

TO ORDER PUBLISHED COPIES WITH COLOR COVERS
We are selling beautiful offset printer versions of the guide with a color cover at low cost. Please contact orders@theicarusproject.net.

FEEDBACK + ADDITIONS FOR FUTURE VERSIONS
We are actively planning a Second Edition of the guide that will incorporate even more feedback, suggestions, and ideas from our readers. If you have anything you think we should include, contact will@theicarusproject.net

DISCUSS THE GUIDE AND COMING OFF MEDS WITH OTHERS
You can register at the Icarus website and discuss the guide and medication at our discussion forum:

http://snipurl.com/comingoffmedsforum

HEALTH PROFESSIONAL ADVISORS
While not co-authors, these health care professionals advised the development of this guide and reviewed it for its usefulness:

Alexander Bingham, PsyD Full Spectrum
Patrick Bracken, MD University of Central Lancashire
David Cohen, PhD
Daniel Fisher, MD National Empowerment Center
Peter Lehmann
Bruce Levine, PhD
Bradley Lewis, MD New York University
Rufus May, PhD Bradford, UK
Renee Mendez, RN Windhorse Associates
Joanna Moncrieff, MD University College London
Matthew Morrissey, MA Full Spectrum
Catherine Penney, RN
Maxine Radcliffe, RN Action Medics
Judith Schreiber, LCSW Soteria Associates
Claudia Sperber Licensed Acupuncturist
Peter Stastny, MD INTAR
Philip Thomas, MD University of Bradford
Barbara Weinberg Licensed Acupuncturist

CREDITS
Thanks again to everyone involved in making this guide happen, and be on the lookout for upcoming publications!

Written by Will Hall.
Published by the Icarus Project and the Freedom Center.
Thanks to Amy Bookbinder, Dave Burns, Oryx Cohen, Mary Kate Connor, Marc Dinacola, Dianne Dragon, Sascha DuBrul, Empties, Vikki Gilbert, Chaya Grossberg, Richard Gilluly, Molly Hardison, Gail Hornstein, Mollie
Hurter, Jonah, Krista MacKinnon, Ashley McNamara, Alex Samets, Seven, Bonfire Madigan Shive, Jessica Max Stein, Terramuggus, and many other collaborators and allies.
Cover art: Ashley McNamara. Art design: Carrie Bergman.
Contributing artists: Fly, Gheena, Miss Led, Ashley McNamara, Erik Ruin, Janice Sorensen, and Bec Young.

liz | 10:52 AM | Uncategorized

Schizoaffective Disorder Made Me Do It: Stab a Scientologist

It wasn’t Tom Cruise, though. No worries.

Woman accused of murder denied bail

liz | 4:08 PM | Uncategorized

Sleep apnea treatment has potential benefits

Science Daily reports a new possible treatment for depression, and it involves the continuous positive airway pressure (CPAP) thingies that people use for sleep apnea. A new study published in the Journal of Clinical Sleep Medicine, which usually puts me to sleep (ba-da-bum), showed that “the institution of CPAP therapy resulted in a significant decrease in those symptoms of depression that were assessed at both the short-term and long-term follow-up periods.”

OSA: Positive Airway Pressure Therapy Improves Symptoms Of Depression

liz | 11:11 AM | Uncategorized

It must be said…

Everyone has been very kind in telling me they’d be sad if I died. And Josh, let me know if you’re coming to Philly! A beer wouldn’t be that weird.

As for blogging, it seems working at a partial hospitalization program leaves little time for the computer. But I love it, and am glad to be so engaged with meaningful work that makes a difference for mental health consumers. I promise to find a better balance between that job and this one. It’s taking me time to adjust. Change is hard. But I think it’s exhilarating too. I think if I had to choose, I’d opt for change over stasis every time.

You are all kind and generous people, and I appreciate your caring. I also appreciate how engaged people are when they comment here, and how willing to talk to others. And for those who just started to comment, don’t stop! We love it.

Again, thanks to all. I’m not going to die, though. Who would take care of my hamster?

liz | 7:50 PM | Uncategorized

The Trouble With Spikol: Print Edition: “Dying to Know”

Why do I think a lot of TTWS blog readers will understand what I mean in this one? Maybe because, in a way, you all are my true friends.

Not long ago I started to obsess over who’d be sad if I died. The question came on like a malevolent flu, and wouldn’t get out of my head. I scrolled through my cell phone address book. I looked at old birthday cards in my attic. I checked my email inbox and sorted names.

Things got morbid when I went to lunch with my ex-husband, who’s now my closest friend. “Would you be sad if I died?” I asked him over a steaming bowl of pho.

Ever the master of understatement, he shrugged and deftly speared another vegetable with his chopsticks. “I guess,” he said.

You guess? You guess?
I racked my brain for an appropriate response, then reminded him that if he died I’d be devastated.

I demanded equal devastation in return. I got the feeling he’d think about it and get back to me.

Later I realized the reason I’d be devastated is because I have so few friends. I’m a warm and open person, and I seem to be well liked by co-workers and intermittently at parties. But I’m not truly close to people.

This has long been remarked upon by my mother, who has, at any given moment, at least 50 true friends. If she gets a cold, the phone is busy for days with people calling to know how much her throat hurts.

Does she have a fever? It’s all right—they’ll hold on while she checks. And they actually care. And she actually cares about them.

My father, on the other hand, is more aloof, and I guess that’s where I get it. His closest friend in recent years was his dearly departed Yorkshire terrier Sugar. Now he has a finch.

“You’re a Spikol,” my mother tells me. “I worry about you.”

In her estimation, my father, the originating Spikol, is saved by her aggressive geniality. But what about me, floating on a lonely raft without a shore to land on?

She actually used that metaphor. Credit where it’s due.

All this is why I was thrilled to find the book Friendship: An Expose by Joseph Epstein. Epstein is the former editor of The American Scholar, and the author of books like Snobbery and Envy.
I thought I could learn something from Epstein, who professes himself “overwhelmed by friends.” But I’m glad I’m not on his radar. Here’s his account of an interaction with a poet:

“[He] talked through the meal about himself, his small triumphs, his enemies, his good works, his plans for his brilliant future. At the end, I wanted to touch his hand and say, ‘Forgive me, but you have spoken way too much about yourself, especially in the presence of someone who, in our puny literary world, is much better known and more important than you. A serious mistake, especially if you plan to have lunch with me again.”

Wow. Harsh. The Philly version of that, I suppose, would be if I had lunch with John Grogan and talked too much about my hamster. Which I would certainly do.

The best part of Epstein’s book is the first part—the chapters in which he talks about friendship in the history of philosophy. But putting Aristotle aside—as I did so many times during the years of my higher education—I find more wisdom in a yearbook signature from my best friend in high school Abby Gross:

“Do you remember that McDonald’s commercial? This 12-year-old girl is there with her friend and she says, ‘This is Chrissy. She’s my best friend in the whole world.’ And then you see all these scenes where they’re dancing in the rain, and pretending they’re rock stars, and laughing hysterically, and at the end she says, ‘What I like best about Chrissy is … she’s my best friend.’ I don’t want to compare you to a McDonald’s commercial, but you are the ‘Chrissy’ I always wanted.”

Beat that, Epstein. I’ll bet he doesn’t even go to McDonald’s.

I wrote something sweet to Abby too, but like Epstein’s book, it was agonizingly pretentious, quoting not McDonald’s but Dickens. How shameful is that? I hope she destroyed it.

Abby lives in Seattle, and we see each other only once a year. I’ve never visited her there, despite repeated invitations. It always seems too hard, too overwhelming, as though she lives in Jakarta. But to me (though probably not to her), she’s as integral to my life as she was in 1986.

I emailed Abby to flesh this out. I reviewed my other closest friends and realized vintage is a problem. The three other people I care most about in the world are people I met in 1968, 1975 and 1986, respectively.

What happened since then?

I got sick. People dropped out. I lost my ability to form healthy friendships. And why improve upon perfection? I’ll never have friends like the ones I started out with.

Sometimes I think, “I’m a loner,” and imagine myself in a Tom Waits song to make it all seem cool. But I do want people to be sad when I die.

Will you be sad? If yes, give me a call. I have a yearbook for you to sign.

liz | 3:03 PM | Uncategorized