Comments on: Gay Brain, My Brain, Your Brain…

By: Sherry

Sherry — Thu, 03 Jul 2008 19:19:06 +0000

I think the reason why people feel studies like this are important is because the bedrock rationale for the “sinful” nature of homosexuality rests upon the notion it’s a choice. Whenever I run into this I press the person to tell me when they CHOSE to be hetereo. I express great curiousity about this, since I do not recall ever making a choice to be hetero, nor does my husband. The results can be interesting, various permutations of denial, subject changing, etc.

It’s tempting to think that if you can PROVE it’s not a choice that you’ll shut these people up. But my guess is we’ll only embark upon a new round of denial, subject changing, etc.

I have to give the people doing these studies A for effort. I’ll be happy when the whole subject ceases to be a topic of discussion because it’s a non-issue.

By: mwill

mwill — Mon, 23 Jun 2008 20:30:43 +0000

interesting article on ABC about a lesbian wedding and the bride’s straight brain.
http://abcnews.go.com/Health/story?id=5196348&page=1

By: Just Me

Just Me — Sun, 22 Jun 2008 02:38:08 +0000

I’m a woman happily married to a woman for many years, so I usually call myself a lesbian. In general I’m attracted to both men and women so if the conversation is about underlying sexuality I call myself bisexual instead. But that instantly causes smirks and threesome comments, which is so annoying. I’ve got no problem with non-monogamy, but we happen to be monogamous, and having to explain that against the smirks and assumptions but still not disparage non-monogamy is just exhausting. And having to label myself according to attraction to a certain gender is just silly anyway. It is much more relevant to me that I’m attracted in general to people who are tall than people who are short than that I am more attracted to people of a certain gender. But nobody goes around asking happily partnered people to define their sexuality according to whether they like tall people or short people. I’m much more of a tall-person-o-phile than a bisexual or lesbian. Really, why do people care so much about gender?

By: Dayvan Cowboy

Dayvan Cowboy — Thu, 19 Jun 2008 16:38:58 +0000

I’m heterosexual — so no experience — but I’ve been with bi women and hetero women who just had some “experiences”. Isn’t the willingness of mostly women to have some homosexual experiences, while hetero men will probably not try it “once or twice” a sign that “homosexuality” is just a blanket term for two very different things that are women-women and man-man attraction? My experience with gay, bi and hetero men and women has led me to think this.

By: Brooks

Brooks — Thu, 19 Jun 2008 02:50:18 +0000

Sarah O. sez:
>> “Seems to me everybody’s brain is hard-wired to find the female body attractive.” <<

- – - – - – - – - – - – -

Dear Sarah O.,

Meaning no offense to anyone, I must respectfully disagree with you. As a gay man lacking even an atom of bisexuality, I much prefer my women fully clothed.

By: David

David — Thu, 19 Jun 2008 00:51:23 +0000

Hi Liz, I got a chuckle reading about being attracted to cartoon characters. When I was a young lad, I had it big for Veronica in the “Archie” comic strip. It got to the point that I’d take the comic pages up to my room and trace lovely Veronica onto a blank piece of paper. Of course my version had her completely naked. Oh, how scandalous I felt! I guess I remember the rather buxom chick in L’il Abner. But my heart belonged to Veronica. I mainly remember those years as being confusing as hell. Crazy dreams and inclinations. And then there were the Sears catalogues (bra section) and National Geographics. I think that was the real age of innocence. Thanks for letting me think back on a simpler time. (I still love you Ronnie). David

By: Rachel

Rachel — Wed, 18 Jun 2008 08:06:46 +0000

I can’t imagine too many straight girls finding Dagwood sexy. I do recall getting that funny feeling for Disney’s Aladdin though…

I too am more attracted to women physically, though I tend to be more attracted to men psychologically, if that makes any sense. For the most part, I am attracted to the person. But I hate using the term “bisexual” to identify myself for two reasons. The first is that if I tell a man I am bisexual, he immediately thinks “threesome!” Not something I am interested in. The second is that when I came out as liking women but called myself bisexual, people didn’t seem to take my attraction to women seriously. It was just “college experimentation.”

Well, I graduated a year ago, and I am still attracted to women. Most of my relationships have indeed been with men, but I feel that this is due to the simple fact that it is easier to meet men. In spite of this, of the three meaningful relationships I have had out of my otherwise rather fleeting affairs, two of them were with women. In fact, the closest I ever came to falling in love was with one of these women.

If I were to identify myself, I would probably call myself “queer,” since it applies to me in ways beyond my sexuality. Sometimes I call myself half-gay/half-straight; when I’m with a woman I’m gay, but when I’m with a man I’m straight. But I am definitely not straight-up straight. I admit that I haven’t been actively involved in the gay community, but I am often surprised that most men take it for granted that I am straight. I don’t strive to come across as one way or the other, but when I compare myself to the way most of the straight women around me dress and act, I know I don’t resemble them. I like to feel like I look good, but I will not sacrifice comfort for the sake of beauty, and unlike almost every other woman who works in my office, I don’t wear makeup or heels. My jewelry usually consists of a garnet (my birthstone) ring and maybe stud earrings. Whatever, apologies for going on so long.

By: Sarah O.

Sarah O. — Wed, 18 Jun 2008 04:49:15 +0000

When my first child, a girl, was born, she was clearly instinctively attracted to my breasts. It occurred to me that the only babies who survived throughout time have had strong attractions to the breast. So, does it follow that all humans find breasts attractive? Seems logical to me.

The other odd thing that happened, I realized that everyone in my new family liked my breasts. A LOT. My breasts were the heart of the family, making both mating and feeding of the resulting young possible.

Seems to me everybody’s brain is hard-wired to find the female body attractive.

By: Dresden

Dresden — Wed, 18 Jun 2008 04:00:26 +0000

Hi there.
I just read about this study and had the same questions as you. I always tend to think of this debate (whether homosexuality is hardwired or not) is trivial and a distraction in the political debate about gay rights. Being gay doesn’t have to be “natural” for us to treat individuals equally under the law. Duh. So, thanks for sharing your experiences. In the past, I’ve gone with the “hetero” label but mostly because it was normative and what I was “supposed to be.” Now I agree more with what you decided, just to be myself. And that self doesn’t come with sexual orientation labels. Why close off half of the population to love or support a binary of gender in the first place?! Anyways, thanks again for sharing your ideas.

By: scott

scott — Tue, 17 Jun 2008 23:05:02 +0000

I find the study of this entire topic interesting. Interesting in that who cares? I know straight people, gay people, fluid people (to use your term), and you know what? They are people. Period. The label thing is one we should really discourage or downplay.