Comments on: Ask Amy Gets a Whopper http://blogs.philadelphiaweekly.com/trouble/2008/06/27/ask-amy-gets-a-whopper/ A blog about mental health Fri, 20 Nov 2009 05:55:48 -0500 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.8.4 hourly 1 By: Fallingleaf http://blogs.philadelphiaweekly.com/trouble/2008/06/27/ask-amy-gets-a-whopper/comment-page-1/#comment-3306 Fallingleaf Sat, 28 Jun 2008 14:16:46 +0000 http://trouble.pwblogs.com/2008/06/27/ask-amy-gets-a-whopper/#comment-3306 I would have to agree with the response that was linked to: the husband has set the terms of his compromise to this situation, doesn't seem interested in further compromise or discussion; and the wife needs to determine whether or not she can live with this and still be happy. I would have to agree with the response that was linked to: the husband has set the terms of his compromise to this situation, doesn’t seem interested in further compromise or discussion; and the wife needs to determine whether or not she can live with this and still be happy.

]]> By: M. J. http://blogs.philadelphiaweekly.com/trouble/2008/06/27/ask-amy-gets-a-whopper/comment-page-1/#comment-3305 M. J. Fri, 27 Jun 2008 22:22:30 +0000 http://trouble.pwblogs.com/2008/06/27/ask-amy-gets-a-whopper/#comment-3305 *** Liz - this warrants your review separately from my post, although you may include it. The two topics do not mesh well together. http://wwtdd.com/post.phtml?pk=8601 *** Well, for God's sake. The guy is mentally ill and makes irrational decisions which have ripple effects throughout his family. At the same time, Mrs. SAD has a responsibility here too. If he's not willing to accept the possibility that his condition is treatable (much as mine is or that of someone habituated to drugs or alcohol), how can a marriage work? ...It can't. As someone like Mr. SAD, but who jumped into treatment early on because life was too frigging miserable or frenetic to do otherwise, I can appreciate the burden on my partner. How many excuses did he make over the years to cover my absence from social functions? What long-term savings and income hits did we take from an inappropriate career change, hospitalizations, and other nonsense brought about by my bipolar disorder? All of this is about him, about me, and about us. This is why I'm creating a community property environment for my pension and benefits through a civil union/domestic partnership/whatever. I can't fix past behavior, but I can do my best to help later in life, especially if BP does shorten my life expectancy. ***

Liz – this warrants your review separately from my post, although you may include it. The two topics do not mesh well together.

http://wwtdd.com/post.phtml?pk=8601

***

Well, for God’s sake. The guy is mentally ill and makes irrational decisions which have ripple effects throughout his family. At the same time,
Mrs. SAD has a responsibility here too. If he’s not willing to accept the possibility that his condition is treatable (much as mine is or that of someone habituated to drugs or alcohol), how can a marriage work? …It can’t.

As someone like Mr. SAD, but who jumped into treatment early on because life was too frigging miserable or frenetic to do otherwise, I can appreciate the burden on my partner. How many excuses did he make over the years to cover my absence from social functions? What long-term savings and income hits did we take from an inappropriate career change, hospitalizations, and other nonsense brought about by my bipolar disorder?

All of this is about him, about me, and about us. This is why I’m creating a community property environment for my pension and benefits through a civil union/domestic partnership/whatever. I can’t fix past behavior, but I can do my best to help later in life, especially if BP does shorten my life expectancy.

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